Super Confused.

Many of you who had read my blog about thanks and missing people gave me some really great responses. I so appreciate all of those who care and consider me still a friend. The past couple of weeks I have really been struggling here. I feel like my life in Utah is just continuing on without me just fine. Almost like it made no difference? I called my old manager yesterday (question about my discount policy) and my heart almost broke talking to her. I really miss work and all my great friends there. Same thing with Drill and my High School friends. I miss it but does it/they miss me? It is so hard reading blogs, facebook post, etc. hearing about all the good things in Utah and listening to what my friends have been doing. It seems as I was kinda forgotten in the middle of things. Yet at the same time I am not completely connected to my life here. I love school, and I definitely have some great friends here but I am not attached like I thought I would be. This morning was the worst because I woke up from dreaming I came home to visit and it was the best feeling in the world. Ya I guess I am homesick but where do I fit? I am starting to have doubts whether or not I am in the right place right now and doing the right thing, I am just not connected anywhere. I am hoping things will get better and that maybe I just need to let go of my Utah life but I am beginning to think that's impossible. How can I just forget my friends and family that I loved and not be concerned or interested in their lives. Do I totally sound like I am on crack? I guess it is just something I will have to think about, so confused.